I'm rewriting an old list of poetry prompts for myself. This is what I just jotted down:
Does anyone else think this is telling of my current state of mind?
Do I like my life? Yes, absolutely I do! But there are evidently some feelings churning just underneath the surface that hint to my current almost ever-present scowl.
And I look around me and the singles look at the married and the married look back at the singles and they both feel the same list.
The young look at the adults and the adults would give anything for one more day in the sandbox with their friends.
So we know it's not circumstances, or at least not a checklist that can be filled out to insure a lifetime of happiness.
Is it in the spouse you find? No. People change and as a married person its not your role to stunt that growth but to accept it and continue to love.
Is it in the freedom of living your dreams? No. Who knew so much would have to be compromised and sacrificed to get where you are now?
The house, kids, money, fame....if immortality were a reality it would be on here, too, sitting next to our accomplishments, desires, and expectations which inevitably at some point fall short of satisfaction.
Is it about having enough faith? I'll tell ya, 'No' to that as well. You can't always blame 'lack of faith' for an emotionally low time. Sometimes the day just seems darker than usual. Sometimes you cry and you don't know why.
I'm sorry. I should've warned you at the beginning; I don't have a moral, lesson or any advice of hope for you today. If you find comfort in the co-suffering of others then I guess you can be assured of that.
The wealthy, famous, married, independent, successful, young and old
all sometimes cry without knowing why.